Living

Things are going good, staying busy. I went to my first doctor’s appointment today. I am going to a midwife that was recommended by LDS Family Services here. I really like her and their office seems good. We just talked a little and she said everything looked fine and I got to hear the Baby’s heartbeat! It was awesome to finally have some proof that a child is living inside of mE, because sometimes things seem so surreal. It was fun.

I also went to an appointment at LDS Family Services this week. My counselors are very good and kind and one is actually in the bishopric at my church. They gave me more information and answered some questions. They told me that at some point I will have to tell P that I am still pregnant, so that there are no future complications with the adoption. I am going to wait a month or two, until I have more closure with him. I am not worried though, because I think he will understand that this is my decision, no matter how sad he might be.

Idaho is pretty good. Mostly it is just nice to spend some more time with my family, although I haven’t made too many friends, but hopefully will soon.

I have been thinking somewhat about the openness of the adoption. I know I definitely want it somewhat open…like just keeping in some kind of contact, maybe receiving pictures once in awhile, that kind of thing. I know some girls who stay with the family for awhile at first, but I think this would be way too hard for me. We will see...